TO PREG OR NOT TO PREG (dedicated to my sis in law expecting her first kidlet)

A co-worker and I were talking about how funny it is the pressure that people put on other couples. They may not know it they may not realize that they’re doing it but it can cause tension and stress and create obsessive monsters (aka moi).

BEFORE THE WEDDING

 When people see a couple and they’ve been together longer than 6 months the pressure for marriage starts. “When are you gonna tie the knot??”  “You know marriage is so awesome to spend your life together for the rest of your life!” “You get to pool your money together and enjoy life” Blah blah blah.. OH don’t get me wrong I love my DH with all my heart I said he was my rock at our wedding and I stand by that he is my rock!

AFTER THE WEDDING

Bam! Whamo! The negative stories!!! “Oh you shouldn’t have gotten married!” “Why didn’t you just live together that way if it doesn’t work out you can save money on lawyers?” “My husband is an idiot and most of them are!” “Now that I’m married I can’t do anything without discussing it with my spouse.” And the ever so popular quote normally made the NIGHT of the wedding!!! “Happy wife happy life” complete with an eye roll from the male making the comment…

BEFORE THE BABY …ABOUT ONE WEEK AFTER YOUR FRICKIN WEDDING

People are even as bold as to say these things on the wedding day!!! Please people! Give the newlyweds a minute to enjoy life together and don’t start putting baby in the woman’s head!!! They say things like “so are you gonna have any babies soon?” My husband and I bought a humongous house before the wedding it’s a four bedroom home and we bought it mostly because we wanted family to come out and visit and stay comfortably. And we also knew in the future we would have some children but weren’t buying it for that reason…

Oh ya the minute ppl heard the size of the home they instantly assume. “Oh are you pregnant???” “So this is baby’s room?” (Meanwhile there’s a queen size bed and dresser in there).

And then there is the sales pitch for baby: “Oh a baby is so wonderful. They coo and they’re so sweet.” “Parenting are the best days of your life”. “Being pregnant is so awesome, you glo!” “You get lots of loot at your baby shower”  “you’re at your most attractive when you are pregnant”

AFTER YOU’RE PREGNANT

Now I’m not PG but I’m going off of what my co-worker told me about her experience. People start telling you about their horror stories in the delivery room!!! Like that you poop if you push too hard “why do you think they only give you ice chips???” someone told her.  Oh and then the morning sickness doesn’t just happen in the morning … go figure… then why the hell do they call it that???? Oh and it can last the whole pg!! Hrmmm what else… let’s see… Oh right! You know that “you’re at your most attractive when your pg” and “you glow”. From what I hear of it, you glow because you just ralphed in the nearest garbage bin! Not so sexy and even though I think PG bellies are sooo pretty and attractive the women that are pg themselves say Nay nay! They feel like they’re cows or whales or anything else that is large.. Oh and then the bringing up baby stories like “oh you’re pregnant!!??? Be prepared to never sleep again!” Or “you’ll never have time for yourself now!”

So there you have it ladies… If you are expecting don’t let it scare you! Obviously you had to have known some of these facts or stories before you decided to do the BD. And any of the other surprising stories you just brush it off! Cause you’re lucky to be Pg!!! And there are many women out there (including myself) that would kill to have morning sickness all day everyday (yes we are cray cray). I would kill to waddle or get stuck on a couch or have to get up in the middle of the night because our DS or DD are screaming their lungs out!  Enjoy your 9mths ladies enjoy the experience of childbirth and GET AN EPIDURAL!!! Screw the natural thing!!!  Dull the pain and crap on the table you deserve it !!!!